It’s been a long and hectic day at work, and the workload has made you feel overwhelmed, but it is time to go home so you leave. As you are driving home, and the drivers next to you keep cutting you off. And I get it, you're tired, frustrated, and maybe even a little hungry, actually make that a lot hungry. But instead of dealing with your emotions and letting them go, you decided to build up that anger and get pissed and honk at every asshole that gets in front of you. Oh, and when you arrive home, the parking situation is not the best, so you have to park a few blocks down.
When you get home you make it apparent to everyone that you are upset. You slam the doors, you walk really loud, and you are mumbling beneath your breath how everyone sucks. You complain that things “never” turn out the way you want them to turn out.
Things don’t turn out the way you want them to because of your choices. No one told you to lose your cool, you chose to do that on your own. And if you want to stop that disempowering habit then continue reading. People who have high self-esteem are able to tap into whichever emotion they need, whether that be mad, sad, joy, etc., and they are also able to let that emotion go. If you are mad, go ahead and feel that emotion, I encourage you too, but be healthy enough to let that shit go. And before you give me any shit for saying the word shit, I am sure you use prettier words when you are honking at those drivers.
Don’t expect other people to save you from situations. Don’t expect people to go up to you and ask you if everything is okay, just so you can complain about how everyone else is to blame, but yourself. You are wasting time that is counterproductive to your growth. Instead, catch it before it unravels. Catch what? You may ask. Catch, what is causing you so much frustration? Is it something you can control or not control? Is there something you can physically do at that moment to fix the issues? Or does this problem require third-party assistance in which case you would have to wait to fix?
Then, this next step is CRUCIAL, and that is to breathe girl, breathe. Take a moment to breathe and try to calm your mind. Again, it is okay to be mad, and it is okay to let it go. Let your ego go. The third step, become aware of your senses. What are you smelling, feeling, seeing? Try your best not to just focus on the thing that is causing you anger. Look around at the things that are happening around you. When we are so tense and angry we tend to focus on that one thing agitating us and we lose focus on the things around us. The last step is to make a conscious decision to move forward instead of backwards.
I challenge you, the next time you get a moment of extreme tension, follow these steps, and see how your outcome is. What happened as a result of shifting your behavior? You got this!